Family

The definition of family is the group of people who share common ancestors.

Having said that….family doesn’t necessarily consist of a group of people you are related to. The family ‘net’ can be cast further afield to extend to friends (sister from another mister, brother from another mother type of scenarios). Being part of a family also doesn’t guarantee you will all get along or even like each other.

A loving family is not a given….. It can take a lot of effort to maintain and nurture a happy family unit. Growing anything takes time, hard work and consistency, especially with children! We need to make connecting to our loved ones a priority.

Being family oriented doesn’t mean spending every single second of every day with each other,…all you need to do is invest some time and some effort into maintaining a happy family unit.

How do you become family oriented? Easy…well not really, but here are few thoughts that could (hopefully) bring you and your family closer together.

1. Be there for the ‘big’ moments

You may not make every school or sporting event, but do your best to be present for the super important moments, like the school play, graduation or sporting final. Remember, it’s important to keep your word – if you make a promise to be there, keep your promise; it shows your child that you love them and you’re committed to their happiness.

2. Plan Family Time

Plan regular family time every week (game night, movie night) or pack a picnic and jump in the car and go for a family drive – destination unknown…it’s all part of the fun. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter what you do…the main thing is, you’re doing it ALL TOGETHER. Turn off the electronic devices and connect with each other face-to-face for some quality time. Granted this will be harder as your children start getting older, but try and look at things that will keep them engaged……good luck with that.

3. Show Your Love

Your family don’t need you to shower them with expensive gifts all the time – sometimes it’s the little things that mean the most when you’re showing them you love them. What is actually important is that your spouse and children feel they are loved, appreciated, and important. Why not leave a note of encouragement for your child on a day when they have a big test or a hot choccie and a cuddle on the couch if they have had a crappy day. Small gestures often speak the loudest (when in doubt – have Shania Twain in the back of your mind singing “That don’t impress me much)

4. Be an Active Listener

You know that feeling when you yourself are trying to tell someone something important and it’s like you’re talking to a brick wall. Don’t be that person – if you don’t like it, why would you think they would? Give your family your FULL attention when they talk to you. Put the phone down, turn down the volume on the TV (or even turn it off completely), and give them the focus and attention they deserve. Make eye contact, ask questions, and actually engage with them in a conversation. Surely your family deserves to be the centre of your world for just a few minutes each day (short term pain, for long term gain…joking).

5. Practice Self-Care

Make sure you allow yourself time to unwind and allow you to be more present for the people you love. Don’t forget to take care of your own needs so that you can take care of the people you love.

Try not to take your family for granted…..if you do, you could be on your way in putting distance from those you love. So by putting a few of these steps in place and invest and put your family at the centre of your heart. Know they are important and their happiness and well-being are tied to your own happiness and well-being.

Families can be hard and we all have different personalities, but if you invest some time is in fostering a happy, loving and safe environment, who knows what you could overcome.